Friday, October 3, 2014

ME Day

Welcome to a Secret Subject Swap. This week, 14 brave bloggers picked a secret subject for someone else and were assigned a secret subject to interpret in their own style. Today we are all simultaneously divulging our topics and submitting our posts.

My “Secret Subject” is:

"For one day, and one day only, you have no fear. No self-doubt. No limits (financial or travel), no obligations, and no one to worry about but yourself. What do you do?"

It was submitted by:


A day for myself. Just for me? I….hmmm…this is so foreign to me that I have literally spent days thinking about this. I would have to stop myself at some point because I would be crossing out options thinking “there would be no one to take care of the animals if I travel” or I would be thinking about doing something that would realistically be for someone else instead of just for myself. This has been one of the more difficult prompts I’ve faced. It’s just not my nature to do something solely for myself. Even when I buy something that is JUSTFORME like a new dress, I always throw something in the cart for the kid, the pets, and a friend. It’s standard practice. When it comes to my time, something I value far more than possessions or money, that need to share is even stronger. So, in the spirit of that, I think that’s what I’ll do…

First of all, I have to make the most of this day so there will be no sleeping. This starts at exactly 12:00 a.m. I’d take my kiddo, Evan, out for a huge campfire/smores session. We have the perfect backyard for this. Living in the country affords us the best view of the night sky, AND we have a pretty awesome telescope. Most nights I’m incredibly busy preparing his schoolwork for the next day and with doing my own schoolwork, so we rarely have nights when I can just chill and relax with him with no obligations. He’s a huge fan of smores and I’d be lying if I said I’m not.

By 1, we’d be full of marshmallows and chocolate (dark for me and milk for him), but we’d also smell like smoke so quick showers all around. I’d get ready in the brand new Jetson’s style Makeup/Dressing machine that takes all the work out of putting on my clothes and face, take him to his Nana’s (which she would agree to since there are no limitations but she would never actually agree to do at 2 am), and get ready to start traveling. As noted in previous blogs, I have a few pen pals that don’t get many visitors, so I would drive to the airport in Tallahassee and a chartered flight would be waiting to take me around the country to visit with my friends. I don’t get to travel much and never get to fly. I also hate crowds and being around a bunch of strangers so a private chartered flight makes the most sense. Spending my day with people I am rarely or never able to see that take up so much of my free time with letters is just about the best way I can imagine to spend it. There would have to be 5 stops: Livingston, TX; Helena, GA; Graceville, FL; Ione, CA; and, Waverly, VA. I suppose that there may not be an airport in the exact place I need to be so I’d also hire a driver at each airport to take me where I need to go. That would be preferable to the treatment I sometimes get when visiting the Polunsky Unit in Livingston on my own. I know without a doubt that most people assume I write letters to inmates and help with cases and do what I do solely for the people I write, but if I agreed with that sentiment, it would be a total lie. I get a lot out of this myself. It has taught me a lot about myself, made me stronger, made me a better person ultimately. I learn a lot about any variety of topics from physics to werewolf lore to the Crusades to video games. I make real connections that aren’t based solely on the fact that I’m trying to do something good. In other words, these visits wouldn’t be altruistic in any real sense and just as much for me as for them so I’m totally counting them for this trip. It’s my day; I’ll do what I want. Right? Right.

I wouldn’t be able to afford my friends too much time each since there are 5 stops and flights between each stop, but short visits are better than none. I’d start on the east coast going from Graceville to Helena to Waverly then flying out to Texas then California. Hopefully the time difference to California is enough after the longer flight to squeeze me in before visiting hours are over, then it would be tattoo time. If I’m already in California, why not? I’d pick up a drawing from my friend there in Ione who is a most excellent artist and find myself a place to get it done. Money is no object and with no limitations I’d be able to walk in ahead of any current appointments and get whatever I want, so why not? I’ve been wanting a quill and inkwell to symbolize my love of writing, but there’s also a chance I’ll be getting a pretty rad Tank Girl pin up to symbolize my take charge, rebellious nature. (Tank Girl from the comic not the movie though I do love the movie). Of course, I’d have my best friend, Brandon, with me to hold my hand and keep me laughing through all the pain, so maybe I’d ask the artist to finish his Velma pin up while we’re there. By then, it would be getting pretty late on the West Coast but I couldn’t have a me day without hitting a concert. And since there’s no limitations I’d put together my own line up. Time Machine and Teleporter needed.

Top 5 no limitations concert list:

1. The Allman Brothers Band with Duane Allman back from the dead but not undead.

2. Graveyard

3. The Black Keys (so I could make out with Dan Auerbach).

4. Janis Joplin with Big Brother and the Holding Company with her final number being Mercedes Benz.

5. 90s era Stone Temple Pilots but not on drugs. Is that possible? I guess if bringing back Duane Allman from the dead is possible for this blog then I can perform the miracle of making Scott Weiland not a junkie.

So, then I would stop time with another machine for approximately 6 hours so I could also add:

1. The Jimi Hendrix Experience

2. Nirvana. I mean, this is obvious for someone my age, but fucking hell it has to be done.

3. Derek and the Dominoes. I’ve already brought Duane Allman back from the dead so why not?

4. Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings.

5. Buddy Guy playing his entire Sweet Tea album. Very critically underrated in my opinion. And, of course, he has to do a duet with Sharon Jones.

6. Baroness with Summer Welch still on bass and before the release of Yellow and Green playing mostly songs from the First and Second EPs. Yes, it has to be this specific or no go.

And for a bonus, let’s throw in Layne Staley era Alice in Chains.

At this point, I would use the time machine that brought Jimi, Janis, Duane, and company back from the dead to the venue to go back to the East Coast earlier in my Me Day so I could hang out with Ash from More Than Cheese and Beer for awhile (we need to make plans for our Halloween-themed hetero-lifemate wedding) then hit a taping of the Daily Show with Jon Stewart. I would spend the rest of the time I had after said taping either convincing him to marry me or having sex with him (which might actually convince him to marry me).

Yes, I know he’s already married.

No, I don’t care. It’s Jon Fucking Stewart.


Here are links to all the sites now featuring Secret Subject Swap posts. Sit back, grab a cup, and check them all out. See you there: Baking In A Tornado The Momisodes Spatulas on Parade Stacy Sews and Schools The Bergham's Life Chronicles Evil Joy Speaks Dinosaur Superhero Mommy Silence of the Mom Climaxed Sparkly Poetic Weirdo Someone Else’s Genius Crumpets and Bollocks Confessions of a part-time working mom Small Talk Mama


  1. WOW!! What a day that would be!!!!! Can I come??? LOL

  2. You ensared me from the beginning with Evan and smores.

    Love how you spent your day full of love for family, friends, and of course music. Your concert sets are awesome, you know Janis is my girl.

    I trust your music judgment so since I've never heard of Derek and the Dominoes I am assuming it would be wise to check them out?

    1. Music History Time! Yeah, you totally have to check out Derek and the Dominos! This is the group that originally did Clapton's song Layla and as basically a supergroup at the time with guys from other bands. Before they actually did an album, Clapton The Allman Brothers Band play and was so impressed by Duane that he KNEW he had to work with him. So here's the fucker of this album and many of the songs on it (It's called Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs), George Harrison was Clapton's best friend and helped with the production and all that on the album without realizing that every single love song was a ballad from Clapton to Harrison's wife, Patty.

  3. You have made the most out of every minute of your day. Love how it all starts with Evan and runs through all of you passions. PS: Mercedes Benz is my favorite of Janis's songs!

    1. I have a recording of her doing that song live and just laughing at her own wit. It's great. It's one of my favorites to sing in the shower, too, since I already have that Southern (though not Texan) twang.

  4. Rewind.... I'm totally coming with you to see Janis!!!!

    1. Wanna keep her around to sing at our wedding, too?

  5. You better just ask to borrow the T.A.R.D.I.S. LOL! Some very excellent music choices - can I join you for Alice in Chains, Nirvana, and STP?

  6. Sounds like an Ice Cube song...